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Bad Deal - Trade in Today for Tomorrow

I have been thinking about this for quite some time now.

The way I have been working this last few months and telling myself its just this year. This year is for the great future. That is what I have been telling my wife also. That is what I am telling myself again and again for last few hours also as my daughter turns 4 in a few hours.

Is it really worth it? I am stuck here in another country while my family is back in homeland. The formalities for travel just wouldn't process faster for us to be together and I be with her for her birthday. Here it comes that thought again... "It's just this year... this year for the future..."

I have been working real hard. Too hard some people say. Its just that I am enjoying it as well as I know there is much to look forward to. But  at what cost. Sacrifice of family time. Sacrifice of my daughter's birthday.

I have been thinking. Is this a good deal? If somebody asks me to trade in today for yesterday, I would probably say yes. I have written on this aspect before. But on the other side of it, would I trade in today for a better tomorrow?

I think that is a rhetorical question. I think we already have.

We are always chasing after things. Look at us. Just stop...and look at yourself.

There is always something ahead to chase for. But what about what you worked for this last few days, weeks, years... This was something you wanted to bad. So now that you have got what you worked for, just stop and live a little? Stop to smell the flowers. Admire this beautiful world God created.

Nah. I would rather keep running this rat race right? We are really stupid you know. We don't notice it because we are in majority. Its like if everybody is doing it, that's how it should be.

I am so pissed at myself today. I'll not be around my daughter for her 4th birthday. This goes in history. History repeats itself. I hate myself today. I made a bad deal. Traded in today for tomorrow.

Happy Birthday Caterpillar. Lots of prayers.

8 comments:

  1. Happy Birthday to dear Caterpillar...may Allah(SWT) bless her with all what is best for her throughout her life. While as you said there's a majority who tends to trade in today for a better tomorrow and regret the situation that we get ourselves in, there's at least one thing to be thankful about while you are in process of trading in; and that is "technology". You could have or perhaps can still ask Mayg bhabi to set up the live broadcast of the bday celebration for you and turn on your webcam too to be virtually present there and sing "Happy Birthday dear Mahnoor...." along with the family! :)

    PS: This is how a friend's brother attended his sister's wedding :)

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  2. 1, If you are trading in today for a better tomorrow so basically that better tomorrow would help serve a comfortable and better future for your daughters InshAllah

    2, The realization that sometimes people gotta stop and take a break from this hectic routine of professional life it self shows that you care for the beautiful people around you and you love them enough to want to take a break and spend time with them

    3, As soon as you physically get in touch with your family, surprise the lil angel with a "belated birthday bash" by baba and record the moments with your camera to treasure for the rest of your life (If you really love and miss someone, it is never to late to rectify what you missed =) )

    Cheers!

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  3. special moment.. on my blog!!! we missed u!
    Love.

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  4. I'm so sorry. Such a hard question and often I want to answer no but I probably should be saying yes. Happy Birthday to your sweet angel!

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  5. I sincerely hope that it'll be possible for your family to join you very soon or vice versa. :)

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  6. well... u know what, I always tell my fellows not to go abroad for the only reason that they will have stay away from the family.

    I mean we spend like 10...15 years abroad to make our future bright and don't realize that this ideal time which could have been spent with our parents and other family members will be wasted.

    Trust me! Pakistan isn't a bad place to live with your family.... Me and many others are living a very peaceful life here!

    Get Back UTP... your family and this land desperately needs you :)

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  7. this is the question we keep asking without getting any real answers. the temptation to NOT be a part of the rat race is always there but seeing the way things are we just cant bring ourselves to give up! the only thing most of us try to do is strike a balance, not always succeeding but its important we try at least!

    i just hope and oray that you guys get to live together very soon! :)

    belated happy birthday to Caterpillar! :)

    cheers!

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  8. A belated happy birthday to Baba's girl. May she always have all the blessings that parents wish to give her. :-)

    Simple question is do you need be away? is it necessity or luxury? Only you can answer. I can only tell you about my life experience...don't worry about money or materialistic things...they will follow you if it is in your fate...money never brings happiness...loved ones do :-)...God bless you.

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