Ma, Maa, Mom, Mother.
For some reason, I was just missing Mom today. I was watching, "Wake up, Sid!", yes I am a big Ranbir Kapoor fan. That scene, where Sid (Ranbir) is taking pictures of his neighbour and her son and he forgets to click as he watches the mother-son love through the lens which he was obviously was missing with her mom, reminded me of you, Maa!
Its been so many years it seems. We used to be so close, with my Baba away travelling on his sea voyages for 6 months, back for 2 months and then back again, was I your best friend? But then, I wasn't even there. But for me, you were always there.
Walking me to school, driving me to school, ensuring I got on the school van, you were there. You were there when I was a little baby, when I grew up into a boy, teens and then a young man. You know all my secrets, you know all my school and university crushes. You supported me in my downs, you celebrated my successes.
But was I there for you? Have I been there for me? I know, I wasn't.
Even with my lovely wife, my 2 lovely daughters, you will always be my favorite woman in my life. I am not naturally somebody who expresses a lot, but I am learning to do this, my daughters need me to be. They need to be told how beautiful they are, how amazing they are and how lucky I am to have them. They need assurance from a man, who better to give this than their Baba. I have to be that person so they don't look for this somewhere else.
You are a woman, did you need assurance, support, recognition when Baba was away? Sorry, I didn't know. I was too young. Do you need this now?
I am sorry, I wasn't the perfect son. Did I grow up too soon? Did I move away too soon? Get married too soon? Were you done with me? I was just being selfish, just thinking about myself. I went away too soon to run my own family and I didn't look back. Of course I visit on and off but is that quality time with you? Is that enough?
My heaven is beneath your feet. My success of life and hereafter in your prayers. Please don't forget me ever OK? Always keep me in your prayers.
Maa! I love you. Alhumdulillah!
