A thought crossed my mind...about how non forgiving the nature of a human is.... Remember the proverb "A man is known by the company he keeps" , "birds of a feather flock/fly together"....
Look at the following scenario which I think everybody would be familiar with....Some guy has a real bad reputation, people know he has been bad/crooked, has hurt people and overall he is someone who's company u can surely do without....who would be easily be a bad influence on anyone....
After a little while that bad guy grows up and realizes his mistakes and regrets on them and wants to be a different person....He gets in touch with a completely opposite natured person to him who is nice and respected in society and very much loved by people. The kind of person who everyone wants to be friends with ....usually such nice people are very forgiving and after listening to a sob story and how the bad guy has transformed....the nice guy would say ok so you have changed and I don't mind giving our friendship a shot. He would want to help him make that transition....but....
What about us, the bystanders, the world? When we see them as the best of friends what would we think....Would we think that the good person has finally given into the demon and has become a bad person cos after all 'that's the company' he has these days....or would we say that the bad person has turned over a new leaf...
A new person who knows the nice guy would think that the bad guy is a good person also. However if someone doesn't know the good guy (and knows the bad guy) he would assume that since he is around the bad guy's company....he must be similar in nature too.
Can we change that natural attitude we have?....I mean if God can give a second chance to us every time we show the least of regret....Cant we even be a little more caring and try and let go of hard feelings?....I think we can if we try.....and that would definitely make this world a better place to live in with more good people than bad.....
What usually happens is that this transition period for a bad person fails cos we, the people don't accept him as that different person....which is trying so hard to be...We r so cruel...
Further added by Tanya Ansari on 30th Jan 2004
http://www.groups.yahoo.com/group/thepointofview
Thats soo true..i totally agree with Umar....i would like to add something too.....this negative attitude of ours towards a person who wants to "turn over a new leaf" so to say.....can actually make him go back to the way he was, that is being bad...by not giving him a chance to be a better person...we r actually proving him right...he'd be like...I was better off being mean and bad cuz that way i was treating them right...giving them what they deserve......
I mean who gave us the power to judge other people....u know......Islam teaches us tolerance and kindness.....and it also teaches us the fact that if someone does wrong to you, you forgive him and let Allah deal with that person's cruelty....Allah will judge us on our good/bad behavior and who are we to decide what that meanie deserves....Only Allah knows better as to what his punishment is...and like Umar mentioned if tht person later on regrets it....might be possible tht Allah forgives him.....so who r we to keep a grudge against him.....and most importantly......this is what umar and I were discussing the other day that it is very important to forgive ppl....and to ask for forgiveness from somebody who we have wronged.....cuz Allah has given precedence to "Haqooq-ul-Ibad" (The rights of people).....and since I am no angel......if somebody wrongs me I should forgive him/her.....maybe I'd be facing the same situation some day......which is really possible......
Further added by Mishal Saeed on 30th Jan 2004http://www.groups.yahoo.com/group/thepointofview
Well…its a real tragedy…and like mostly such kind of attitude is observed towards the person who wants to turn over…a new leaf...
and Umar is right when he says that we dont give chances…thats the thing, Chances, allowances and justifications… It might be repetition of the concept but that is the actual thing…
And I would just like to add that once realizing the general trend towards the affected person, why to regret n curse over the system again and again? We might not be able to change the system but why become a part of it? We can play our role well…as we play our roles in other aspects of our lives..
We wont be asked for the trend we went along but for our own individual deeds...Whatever one has to give that is the only thing that he can give to others...When one is friendly and kind towards people, its what he/she has…similarly when one treats them cruelly, its again the stuff he/she possesses....
So like definitely we get disheartened ,when we come across cruel attitudes towards ourselves or others, when we see injustice, chances not given but we can light a candle of hope and try to initiate a genuine attitude by giving chances and allowances…
I cant ask anyone to give me a chance or to forgive any other person until I make sure tht I do that myself too…People are cruel but once I decide that I wont be doing the thing that I curse…I can find some comfort! I can be the first step on the ladder...consequently we all...can...
Further added by Amber Ahmad on 30th Jan 2004 http://www.groups.yahoo.com/group/thepointofview
Yes, it is a tragedy and we should all give it thought...that are we not the ones who do this also? .... We often follow the trends of avoiding such people as the society tells us to do, if somebody is bad we play a vital role in making him worse, instead the negligence on the part of the so called good people make him go deeper and deeper in the domain of bad...I think what Islam teaches us is the best way to lead lives, we should not only try ourselves to be good but also preach others to stop doing bad and try to be good, and that is only possible if we practice being good and letting a fair hand to all,
It is very easy to criticize someone else...we sit on one bad deed of someone else for so long, and keep rubbing it in to him, and dont move on to find the good things that that person might have. I believe every person has goodness inside him....
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