It was a hardly a 5-minute walk but it was one to remember as it left me in a long chain of thoughts.
The weather entering its winter-bests. Nice sunshine, enough to create shadows and absolutely beautiful as long as you try to not look at it. The soft cold breeze hitting us and sending a slight chill through the body. I was walking with my daughter following me.
I was noticing her as she was not enjoying the sun hitting her eyes. She unconsciously stepped at an angle behind me. An angle that brought her right into my shadow, taking her away from the sun in her eyes. An angle that could have been painted by an artist. Where is a sasta (cheap :P) artist when you need him.
A moment of pride for the dad. That's the role I would aspire to play. Be the shadow which keeps my family away from the sun. Be the feeling of protection.
The other aspect on a different line of the same thought was my daughter finding her way in my shadow. Moving on the same path that I tread and yet trying to sneak out to enjoy the sun for a while as well. I would not want my children to follow exactly my life. They should take the good things I learnt, avoid the mistakes I made and be brave enough to step out in the sun themselves and "try life" on their own as well.
We reached a place where we had to go over a tape into the parking lot. I got clear instructions from the little one. Baba, I'll go under and you go from the other side. Baba can't go under. I realized no matter how young one is, once he has a generation under him, he will be treated with a little bit of "buzurgi" (respect for the elderly).
While walking towards the car, she refused to hold my hand and I couldn't stop smiling as I walked ahead and then... I heard a fall. Then a soft to loud shriek of pain. My daughter had slipped and had fallen. She was obviously waiting for Baba to come and pick her up. I did the same as expected and felt a bit wanted as well. It was difficult to see her tell me earlier that she doesn't need my hand to hold anymore. Its a mixed feeling when your child tells you that.
Anyway, a bit of story-telling and taking mind off the fall worked and we were driving ahead, back on track. However, during these last 5 minutes I entered yet another stage in life where I have mixed feelings.
I have to learn to grow out of this. I have got to prepare from now so that I am strong enough to let go of them when the time comes.
awwwwwwwww.......
ReplyDeleteand hadd hai yaar .... she is 4 ... and you are already talking about the "let go of them" time!!!
:P
awww.. Thats a lovely post ada.
ReplyDeleteMahnoor's lucky to have YOU as her baba. I remember doing the same with nana saeen.. walking with him and hiding from the sun under his shadow.
good old times. I miss him!
Yet another learning phase.. Life's like THAT!
nai?
*hug*
... this post had me in tears. :-) And a grin THAT huge on my face... its lovely, this montage of emotions.
ReplyDeletebeautiful all the way! :)
ReplyDelete@everybody - aww you people are too nice.... (with one-drop teary eyes)... I would like to thank... my mother... my father... my family...(and it goes on...)
ReplyDelete